i remember every precious moment with you. 

every memory that is cradled tenderly somewhere deep inside. 

i linger on to every sacred stillness. 

i hold on to every blessed silence where tongues were mute but our eyes were screaming. 

i've learned to read into your breathing. 

i've learned to listen to the words your mouth may not say, but your heart will never stop singing. 

you've known me forever. 

you were convinced from the birth of my existence. 

and now i, too, rediscover what has always been familiar to my soul. 

i was woven by this intimacy, for this intimacy. 

your intention is relation. 

your passion is communion. 

i was created a wholehearted lover, by a wholehearted lover 

it runs through my veins. 

i can't run out. 

because you don't run out. 

no one can put out a fire that you ignited. 

your heart is too beautiful. 

i can't look away.

to breathe, is to inhale the very oxygen from your lungs.  

to exist, is to be dependent. to lean into arms much stronger than my own. 

lifesource. to never love is to never live. 

there is a receiving in the giving. 

in losing myself, i find you. 

in the emptiness, there is a fullness that floods in. 

there is a hallowed gift in the sacrificing of self. 

there are parts of me that only learn to live once they've chosen to die.

...

i feel it.
a deep smile.
you look at me.

you dont even know how much i love you. 
you dont even know how much im in love with you. 

i've become used to an earthly kind of love.
conditioned.
i've become used to trying to be enough.
performance.
but your love is different.

i don't have to hide.
you see.
i don't have to pretend.
you know everything.
i don't have to fake it.
you understand.
i don't have to be okay.
you listen.
i don't have to be afraid.
you stay.
i don't have to be ashamed.
you forgive.
i don't have to have it all together.
because you hold it all together for me.

i've learned.
that there's only one voice that defines me.
and you say everything will be okay.
i can dance because you're singing over me.
i can smile because your laughter fills me.
i can grieve because you weep with me.
i can be confident. that i am who you say i am.

i was born to defy against the well known standards.
i was born to be reckless. radical. different.
because when heaven invades earth. it's supernatural.
my story is a testimony. and i won't stop singing.

and the enemy will regret every attack he makes on me.
because what he means to hurt me. will heal me.
what he means to break me. will make me.
what he means to haunt me. will hold me.
what he means to destroy me. will strengthen me.

deep down.
i have found a new confidence.
i  can  freefall
because i know you'll catch me.

you say
baby, are you ready. 
will you go where i am leading. 
do you trust in me completely. 
i am calling. will you listen. 

it doesn't matter where you take me.
i know wonder will carry me.
it doesn't matter where i'm going.
as long as i'm there with you.
i'm not afraid of what i may be losing.
because in you, i have everything.

empty handed. but full hearted.
maybe broken. but never forgotten.
this is just the beginning of my undone.
i've made up my mind.
and there's no going back now.

<3